The last couple of weeks saw a LOT of running around. I was so busy I had to schedule a day to rest. Coming down with a nasty head cold was NOT how I intended to spend it, but I get what I get! It's been a blur of doctors appointments, running to the store, school, homework, and of course, work.
As far as Jesse's journey, we've been at a standstill for quite some time. Two weeks after surgery we had to be a bit of a bug up the rear ends of the radiation team to get us in for his official planning meeting. He was fitted for a radiation mask, which is a very futuristic looking device he'll wear to target where the radiation should go. He gets to actually take it home and decorate it however he sees fit, but they look something like this:
As far as Jesse's journey, we've been at a standstill for quite some time. Two weeks after surgery we had to be a bit of a bug up the rear ends of the radiation team to get us in for his official planning meeting. He was fitted for a radiation mask, which is a very futuristic looking device he'll wear to target where the radiation should go. He gets to actually take it home and decorate it however he sees fit, but they look something like this:
My silly sweet husband. He was so excited by his mask he just wanted to show it off to everybody. It'll be fun to decorate it and see what we can come up with.
Most of the wait was in waiting for the insurance company to approve payment for the chemotherapy pills. In addition to the chemo he will be taking an anti-nausea, and another medication to help fight infection and strengthen his immune system. After his planning meeting, we had two more weeks to wait while they prepared his mask. Next week, finally, we officially begin.
It's been almost 2 months since this nightmare began, and while I know the scariest part is over, one of the hardest parts is about to start. Most of the medication came yesterday. The only thing left is the actual chemo pills. It's potent enough stuff that not only am I not allowed to touch it, but he can't touch it and then touch me without washing his hands. Freaky stuff. I don't mind if those don't come in until the day he's set to start taking them.
It feels like we've been in such a holding pattern for so long, even though I understand why. We're so anxious to get it started so that we can just get it done. Nobody (I don't think) actually expects the next 7 weeks to be easy, but we will all be relieved when it's over. The official completion date for radiation is July 6th, if I've done my math correctly. Just in time for our one year wedding anniversary we WILL be hearing "Congratulations, Mr and Mrs Stearns, the tumor is responding perfectly".
And it isn't as though we haven't had anything else going on while we've been waiting. I'd been going 3 mornings a week for ultrasounds and bloodwork to the CNY Center. To once again protect sensitive information I won't talk about why, but our IUI was canceled at the last minute on Saturday morning. Because I had already used a particular shot in preparation for the IUI, they couldn't switch me over to an IVF because they would have had to do the next part of the procedure at 5:00 on Sunday morning. I was really disappointed... I'd voluntarily used NEEDLES for this! But there was nothing to do but pick up and get ready for the next one.
Jesse once again was my hero. Most other men would likely have been upset but all he had to say was "Okay, when does the IVF cycle start?" I asked him if he would rather wait until he finished his radiation, but he's ready to start now. Well, I didn't have appointments and shots and treatments for either of us to think about, figuring out our finances could take over my thinking while waiting for the next part of anything to start.
Here's where the magic happened.
In talking to my prescription drug provider, and with CNY, we found that if they billed my medication as IUI and used their preferred pharmacy, they would cover a portion of our medications. How much I don't know, but when the LOW end of the medication spectrum is still four figures, any help from insurance would be great. I applied with the financing team they work with for help on medication copays and of course the actual procedure and got turned down. I asked the financial team at CNY, what can we do? She asked me if I knew about the state grant available, because we qualify for it medically.
Come again???
Also, when I first found out that we would need this, I applied for a scholarship run by a group in California. The story behind their decision is long and confusing, but at the end of the day we were chosen for an award which will help us cover another portion of a cycle.
If we were looking for a sign that we should do this? We just had three.
I must also take this moment to give a special shout out to Jesse's and my wonderful family and friends who have stepped forward to help us... my friend who organized a Pampered Chef party, donating all proceeds to Jesse's treatments (SUPER HUGE thank you again to everybody who has ordered, shared, or came to help us prepare some tasty freezer meals). My friend and Zumba instructor who's helping organize a Zumba fundraiser (last Sunday in July... it's going to be EPIC!). To Jesse's friends and co-workers, so many of my friends I know online. I can't even tell you the depth of our gratitude for everything you've done for us!
Next week a new cycle will begin for me, and so will Jesse's radiation and chemo treatments. Maybe it's the worst idea in the world to try both at the same time. But, maybe just maybe, it's the best. It's gonna suck, it's all gonna suck. But in a way it makes perfect sense to both of us be going through these together.
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